Newsflash: LSS (Last Song Syndrome) has Scientific Basis!

Admit it.
There have been times when you just couldn't stop singing "I'm Too Sexy" by Right Said Fred.

And the thought of taking a power drill to your head crossed your mind.

Fear not, friends. You may not have to break out the power tools just yet.







Modern science, in all its wisdom and its penchant for long-winded names like
Phenylalanine and Aphthous ulcers, have dubbed this serious musical affliction as...

(drum roll)

"earworm"

Yes. You read it right.

There's a worm in your ear.
And for the sake of emphasis and drama, I'll type it again.

There's a WORM.

IN.
YOUR.
EAR.

Not literally, of course. How cool/gross is that...

But apparently, someone cared enough to conduct research on this mental affliction that cramps the style of many otherwise cool cats out there. And that noble, noble doctor is Dr. James Kellaris at the University of Cincinnati. (He's no medical doctor, though, in case your wondering. He's got a PhD in marketing, I think. I'm too lazy to check my facts.)


Actually, there's a more gastronomically-acceptable term for the syndrome, it's called Cognitive Itch. (But that wouldn't have caught your attention now, would it?)

So far, the doc's research indicates 3 reasons why we just can't get "I-tak-tak Mo" out of our heads so easily.

1. Repetition
The good doctor says:
"A repeated phrase, motif or sequence might be suggestive of the very act of repetition itself, such that the brain echoes the pattern automatically as the musical information is processed."
Simply put, you have something repeated to you long enough, your brain is going to get the idea you want to remember it (whether you actually do or not).

2. Musical simplicity
Yet another proof of why this world isn't fair.
Apparently, you could be the most brilliant songwriter in the world but still lose out to some schmuck who put a few suggestive phrases together to a preset beat on an electronic keyboard and called it a song. Does "Spaghetti" ring a bell?

3. Incongruity
The research was referring to the irregularity of time measures or the progression of the melodic line.
To that list, I'd like to add sheer stupidity of a song's lyrics.
There's something about human nature that worships all things amazingly cool and amazingly dumb. Hello, American Idol?

Still, if you all think I'm just pulling your leg, check this site hosted by the University of Cincinnati. http://www.business.uc.edu/earworms

For my part, I am to raise as much awareness (and possibly funds) for this endeavor.
If only it brings me one step closer to ridding myself of singing songs by KC & the Sunshine Band.

That's the way
Uh-huh, uh-huh
I like it
Uh-huh, uh-huh
That's the way
Uh-huh, uh-huh
I like it
Uh-huh, uh-huh....